Lost and Found

I've discovered a kind-of, sort-of disturbing fact about myself recently.
I have many "Ah-ha" moments. That's sort-of good, right?
I seem to be recycling them. Um. That's sort-of "Huh?"

"You mean, I figured this out ten years ago?" I asked myself.
It's so shocking coming across an old journal entry writing about an epiphany that I just recently had.
At first, I mean.

After scanning through more journal entries, I am no longer shocked.
I am certain that I WAS brilliant.
Say no more.

Practice

Sometimes it seems like everything I do needs improvement. I can always point to something that I think I could do better. Several years back, Ping gave me a whole series of CDs and books by Stephen R. Covey, the author of "The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People." After I'd opened several of these gifts, one of our boys said, "Are you getting the hint?"

The fact is, we're usually our own worst critic, as cliche as that may be. Recently, I've been considering what I gain from that. I'm not finding anything.

Self-improvement is creative by definition: we are becoming. Criticism is not conducive to such a creative act. As John Cleese put it: "Nothing will stop you being creative more effectively than the fear of making a mistake."

What if I think of everything as practice? It's a process. Not every effort gets the result I want, but whatever I'm working on, I can hone it, refine it, and iterate until I get something I like. I'll know it when I see it. Until then, I'll keep practicing.

Real Lunchtime Conversation: "Song or Poo?"

If you had been sitting with us at lunch today, you would have heard the following exchange as we were opening a new package of RouSong 肉鬆 (a.k.a. "pork floss" or "meat wool"). Actually, as I opened the package, I wasn't sure if it was RouSong or a slightly different kind known as RouPu 肉脯. "Row Poo?" Here's how it went:

Mark: Is this song or poo?
Ping: I don't know.
M: I thought the texture was the difference.
P:  You have to taste it to find out.
M: (takes a bite) It's kind of chewy.
P: Poo, then.
M: So poo is chewier??

It turns out that not only is this poo, it's actually made from mushrooms, so it's GOO POO! (菇脯!)

Our appetites overcame even such a coarse discourse over this course, of course.

Thanks to www.survivalistboards.com for this...uh...accurate image.

"Pícaro" - Now on Soundcloud

Here's a piece I call "Picaro". It's an atonal bit with pizzicato strings and drums. And ...sounds.  2:00

He's in there
Somewhere
In here
No
Still?
Maybe not--
Oh
Yeah
There
Oops!
Where?

Whattheheckisgoingon and Whotheheckarewe?

Ping and I have been at this for three years now. We've gone from Corporate America to Beitou, Taiwan. We've spent a lot of these three years trying to figure out what's up. This week was a rough one. We both floundered, pretty painfully. It's amazing how dark the world can seem when we lose our bearings. But here's the point:

We're still working on getting “what we do” to be closer to “who we are.”

It’s an experiment--a bet, maybe--that we can do something authentic, something that uses everything we have, that opens up all the possibilities, and that somehow serves the world in a valuable, sustainable way.

Have we got it? Not yet. Well, part of it, yes, sometimes. Some days, not at all. We have more questions than answers. Sometimes I wonder: who needs more pretty paintings, more songs, another 

New Music: "Dear John"

Check out the latest original music from Mark and Larry Benigno!
"Dear John"

http://youtu.be/lWust8JKmqw

Mark's Notes: I remember distinctly the night John Lennon was shot. At the time, I had some pretty self-righteous opinions about the ex-Beatle's life, and I actually wrote a song about it. I performed it for several years before I started to question my thinking. This is my open letter to John Lennon, some 35 years later, letting him know: "I think I get it now."

The Songwriting Process: Mark wrote a first draft of these lyrics and emailed them to Larry. Then both of them wrote music for it. The project sat for about a year until Mark wrote a new piece with elements from both originals.

The Stages of Your Miserables Career

As an interesting exercise this morning, I mapped out the characters in the musical Les Miserables as if they were stages in life. I think this is particularly pertinent to theater people, but it could apply to all of us. What do you think? (Right click on the graphic and open it in a new tab or window for a better view.)